My Second Act

There are some big changes on the horizon for me in 2012. I've decided to go back to school to get my Nursing Degree! As shocking as this might seem for a 47 year old wannabe librarian, it really gets back to the core of who I am. And is actually the first step in getting me back on track to my true calling.

From the time I was 5 years old I wanted to be a doctor. I took every science class offered by my HS. I was even a candy striper at the local hospital. And I began my college career as a pre-med student way back in the mid-80s. Then reality hit when I realized I wasn't getting good enough grades to get into medical school. This was a huge crisis for me. I was a wreck for the entire first semester of my sophomore year. When I calmed down enough to think, I decided that I would simply modify my goals slightly and become a nurse. Unfortunately, I was talked out of this by a staunch feminist who told me I would be miserable "taking orders from doctors and emptying bedpans". I was so confused and in such a "state", I thought what she said made perfect sense. I don't believe in regrets, but I sure do wish I had gotten advice from a few more people before abandoning my dream of working in the medical field.

In any case, in all the intervening years, I've never gotten over my love of all things medical and have looked into studying to be a Physician's Assistant or Nurse on a number of occasions. But the time was never right. Until now.

I'm ready to move on from the library where I've worked for nearly 10 years and I have more time now to take classes and study. And I think it's time to follow my instincts. I sure do wish I had listened to my inner voice back in 1984, and I wonder if maybe I'm a little late to the table. Will anyone want to hire a brand new 51 year old nurse? But whenever I start to question my decision, I just imagine looking back at this moment in 10, 15 or 20 years and wishing I had just gone for it. So, that is what I'm going to do. I start January 23rd. Am I crazy? Quite possibly. But I've decided to give it a try. Wish me luck.

First Day of School Traditions

I love traditions. One tradition that I started when Katie first went to pre-school was to take a first and last day of school picture. And this year was no different. Except that this year, even though today was the first day of school for both of my girls, I could only take a picture of Madeleine.



As I was taking the photo, it occurred to me that I wouldn't take any more first day of school pictures of Katie. And it made me feel a little nostalgic. A few hours later, I was checking my cell phone and look what I found...

Katie had taken a first day of school picture of herself and sent it to me as a text message! She had titled the photo "first day of school". Is that the sweetest thing ever? I honestly can't think of a time I've been more touched by a gesture. I spoke to her on the phone later in the day and told how much I appreciated it and how happy it made me. She said that she knew I would be feeling sad and that it would cheer me up. God, I love that girl!

Another first day of school tradition that I started about 8 years ago, is that I spend part of that day at the little beach on the bay in my town. Usually I take my trusty beach chair, a book and some lunch. I sit and enjoy the sights, sounds and smells of the beach (one of my favorite places to be) and I stroll along the water's edge. It's a quiet, peaceful and serene way to catch my breath after a hectic summer. I love the sense of renewal I feel whenever I am at the beach. Here are some photos from today:

In Defense of Praise

In my last post I wrote about the assignment that Madeleine and I did for her English class on the book Lord of the Flies. Well today she came home and told me we got an A+!!! I am embarrassed to admit how excited I was to hear that. It's kind of sad really. I couldn't wait to look at the assignment and read the teacher's comments. It's amazing to me, that at 45 years old and many, many years since I was student, how important those comments were to me. I was not expecting to have that reaction. And it got me thinking...

No matter how old you are, it's nice to receive some validation, encouragement and appreciation for a job well done. I hadn't really thought about that with regards to myself. Of course, as a (mostly) stay at home mom, I don't have many opportunities to hear from a "supervisor" that I've done a good job. I don't mean to imply that my family is not thankful or appreciative of the work I do for them. Because they are and they express it frequently. There just aren't many performance reviews for stay home moms. (Thankfully!) And even in my part time job at the library I don't get that kind of feedback from my boss. It's not often that I hear my initiative was noticed or appreciated. Or that my ideas are valued. Or that my efforts didn't go unnoticed. Or that the extra projects I take on make the library a better place. Until today I didn't think that that kind of praise was a big deal. But you know what? It is. It feels really good when someone comments on something you've done well. It's nice to have feedback on your efforts. It's even nicer to know that someone notices and appreciates when you go above and beyond in your duties. So what do I do with this new found knowledge? Good question. Not sure what I will do about it with respect to my job. But I do know that I will be telling the people around me (and not just my kids) when they've done a good job. I will be sure to mention that I appreciated their extra efforts or that I noticed that they went over and above what was expected. Because you know what? We all deserve to receive recognition for a job well done. If for no other reason than that it feels good.

And Away They Go!

I've been waiting for this day for 9 long years. I can't believe it's finally here. It felt like it would never come and now it's here and I can't believe how fast the time has flown.

Today marks the first day, since Madeleine was in kindergarten, that my girls will be in the same school. I'm not sure why that matters to me, but there is something very sweet about my girls being in school together. Katie is a "rule the school" Senior and Madeleine is a slightly anxious Freshman. In my mind's eye, I picture Madeleine comforted by the fact that her big sister is in the building somewhere and will have her back if need be. As a matter of fact, one of Madeleine's friends called here last night and asked Katie to stick up for her if any older kids hassle her. So, Katie gets to play the big sister role to some of Madeleine's friends as well. I bet Katie enjoys that role. Everyone wants to feel needed.

Today also marks the first day of a whole bunch of "lasts" for Katie (and for me). Today I took the very last "first day of school" picture of Katie. That felt a little sad. I've taken a picture of each of my girls on their first and last day of school since preschool.


Here they are on their first day of Senior and Freshman years:

Notice the shirt. All the seniors made them so everyone will know who's boss!

This is Madeleine's "nervous smile". She very patiently indulged my first day of school picture tradition, even though she was anxious to get going. Thanks, Madeleine!

And Away They Go....

My babies are off to High School. *sniff, sniff*